Thursday, November 10, 2011

Dealing with a Betrayal

Have you ever been betrayed?  Has someone you trusted, believed in, loved, just turn around and behave in a way totally opposite of anything you had ever expected?  Stab you in the back?  Say things to others about you that were untrue?  Lied?  Showed their true colors and show no remorse?

I've had that happen.  Have you? 

How did you react?

I went to my bed and cried.   I talked to my husband, who was ready and willing to jump in and fix things.  I mourned the loss of a friendship, and grew a little thicker skin.  How about you? 

Do we turn the other cheek?  Do we pray for the individual, not just to heap coals of fire upon their heads (Romans 12:20), but to turn their soul back from hell?  (James 5:19-20)

Do we think of Jesus?  Do we remember how Jesus with his 12 closest friends, who traveled for 3 years together must have felt over the betrayal by Judas?  Do we remember how Jesus reacted during the garden scene, His trial, and His crucifixion?  Can we see the love in His eyes towards His friend, who became His betrayer? 

Did you forgive your betrayer? 

Jesus did.

I've had a comment that perhaps Jesus did not forgive Judas, and I will have to do some more study on this before I can comment any further.  The point I was trying to make is that we need to have a forgiving attitude towards someone even if they betray us.  Perhaps we don't have to forgive them unless they ask us, I'm not sure.
However, I know if we keep anger, disappointment and that betrayal close in our hearts & minds, then we will suffer.  Sometimes that person who betrayed us doesn't even care and isn't suffering at all.

1 comment:

  1. Can't wait to hear what conclusion your further study brings you too. Forgiveness is a difficult topic because it's so difficult to do but I agree with everything you said in your post. My husband and I differ on this topic as I'm sure many people do. I firmly believe whether they ask for it or not I must forgive them. I don't think that means I must be their best friend and allow them to "walk all over me" but I do believe I am commanded to be at peace with them as much as is in me and that means I let it go, forgive and move on. If I can't do that then it controls me. My husband believes that they must ask for it in order to receive forgiveness, otherwise he doesn't have to forgive. That, to me, is a scary position to take. Mainly because when I think about it for myself, if I take the position that they must ask for it first then I continue to relive the hurt, anger, frustration over whatever it is that happened and my heart becomes hardened. Why would I do that to myself. Not forgiving allows it to fester and grow into something it should not be. I think the problem is that we confuse God's forgiveness with our own forgiveness of others. Yes, if we want forgiveness from God then we must ask for it and act accordingly but we are not God. Even Jesus on the cross asked God to "forgive them they know not what they do" that doesn't mean they were saved right then and God forgave them of their sins but I do believe it means Jesus forgave them for their treatment of him and was asking God to not hold it against them when they saw their error and came to him for salvation. Just my thoughts on a difficult topic....